Unidentified U.S. tourist under arrest in Tijuana

Dear Bambi,  

I have missed you.  Where have you been?  I do not think you have written anything since Christmas and that was a whole month ago!

Are you in some kind of trouble?  If you are, I know that the folks at Avenida are very generous.  I could take up a collection for you and I bet we would get plenty of money if you need bail or something like that.  

If there are physical ailments involved we have plenty of knowledgeable former medical people who would gladly make suggestions for cures for whatever ails you!  This place is always overflowing  with medical advice on everything.

If you just have the post holiday blues I know exactly what you need.   We have folks here that can throw the best parties ever.  They would be thrilled to throw you a big cheer you up party and it would be the best ever!  Please, Bambi, let us know how we can help YOU!

Avenida Annie

Dear Avenida Annie,

Here's the thing.  I had to leave Kankakee for reasons that I will never reveal.  (And don't anybody go start looking through police records there! Everything was erased!)  I spent a small amount of time in Mexico to get new financing and so forth.  It was difficult because......well, never mind.  However, I am back for a while.  I am temporarily bunking with my dopey cousin, Barbara, but she desperately wants me to move on.  (She worries too much about her reputation is what I think!  So I have visitors.  So what!)  

The biggest problem here is that in order for me to communicate with you people it has to be two-sided!  You have to send me questions about what is bothering you.  I can then send you an answer with a solution.  I have had so much (too much) life experience that I can solve everything and turn your life around.  You have to do a little bit of the work!   I can't do everything although I am a very strong opinionated woman.  Trust me.  Please tell me what is bothering you and I guarantee a great answer.  Hurry please, because dopey Barbara is getting restless and anxious.  If you look in the courtyard you will see she has already thrown out some of my socks!  

Put a note in cubby hole 340 or email maginnisone@ hotmail.com.  Leave a note under Barbara's door or leave one at her breakfast place.  Even give one of her so-called friends a slip of paper which they will maybe pass on to her.

You've got to do some of the work too, Folks!

Bambi (battered  but brilliant!)