BAMBI RETURNS AND HAS PLENTY TO SAY!

Dear Bambi,
What's going on with your supposed cousin, Barbara? Since the Department of Revenue proved she does not exist when she failed two quizzes about who she is shouldn't she go and try to be someone else somewhere else? Why is she still walking around here, annoying everyone? Now that the state has proven that she is not really her, shouldn't she be somewhere else where she is her? What the heck is going on? It is all too confusing to everyone!I happen to know someone who would love to rent her apartment.

Mildred

Dear Millie,
Yes, it is confusing. So do I even have a cousin named Barbara now?I always thought she was really my cousin but who am I to argue with the sovereign state of Illinois? They got enough on me that I am very careful about agreeing with them about everything they say. Do NOT ruffle their feathers. 

This just goes to show that you have to be careful. If she did not file her state income tax none of this would have happened. Let that be a warning to all of you! 

I did hear through my sources that they might pick her up next Monday and put her in a displaced persons camp somewhere. We can only hope. Keep your fingers crossed. Also, I hear there is a waiting list for her apartment. Better sign up right now.

Bambi

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Dear Bambi,
I have some great ideas. Now that the pool is open we could have contests. Who has the best bathing suit cover-up? Who makes the most noise swimming? Who can hold their breath the longest under the water? What do you think about that, Bambi? Of course, there is no use deciding who looks best in a bathing suit. Everyone here knows who would definitely win that one, no question. But how about my other great ideas, Bambi?

Madelyn

Dear Maddie,
You are mad, out of your mind and completely bonkers.

Bambi

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Dear Bambi,
Let's have a good old-fashioned brunch, especially on weekends. We could have a turkey and one of those carving hams or a huge roast beef. I bet someone could make omelets really well. (You know who I am thinking about!)It could become an Everleigh tradition. There is no better way to start the day than with a beautiful meal. 

To make it extra fun and even more inviting why not have people draw numbers when they come in and that will determine where they sit. Then there is no shuffling at the beginning where people try to find a seat without looking desperate. It would be relaxed and mostly congenial. Sometimes they do that at wedding receptions and I've never seen anyone walk out on a wedding reception.Come on, Bambi, I bet you could get it started.

Helene

Dear Helene,
Look, I do not live here so there is not a chance I could start this. Also, there would be too many terrified tenants who could not face NOT sitting with the people they always sit with. Life is tough enough here without something like THAT! You are out of your mind and not very observant.

Bambi

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New questions, ideas, and suggestions are welcome. You know there are things you want to know or to question. Come on, folks, don't make me do all the work! BB